Shinra's always loved human experimentation. We found an entire secret lab deep underground in Midgar. Wasn't pretty.
[ anyway :) cloud is just going to start climbing. enjoy his ass which is absolutely not why he did that ]
... I know he used to be normal. We were friends, too. [ he doesn't expand on what sephiroth found, because he's still not sure he gets it entirely, and also because he is tired of sephiroth being in this pc. and it's partially why they went up here; once cloud gets up he checks to make sure jason made it up alright and then he points at the sky.
[He makes it up fine! And having seen a great ass. Well, he thinks it is a great ass because it’s one he likes.
At the top, he shifts and turns around to put his back to the basin, lifts his head. It’s better than the planetarium because it’s… real. As real as a fake painting in a shitty hotel can be. It’s nothing like the sky in the city.
He stands here, mesmerized by the peppering of stars and the outline of the milky way. It’s so detailed.]
I didn’t even know you could see things like this with your own eyes.
[ it's lightly teasing from where he went to sit down near jason, legs dangling as he looks up himself, glancing at jason out of the corner of his eye to look at his reaction. he sounds and feels fond both. it's terrible and gross. ]
Midgar's as polluted as it gets, but... even in other places in the country where I'd end up going as SOLDIER. Nothing felt quite like seeing the sky from here.
[ there's a shooting star! make a wish jason. mine is to know what the fuck he wanted to tell cloud, but cloud isn't asking yet ]
[He snorts, then realizes Cloud isn’t level with him anymore. He glances down. Oh.
He was too into the sky, fuck.
Lowering himself down beside Cloud, he spills his legs over the edge. Can’t help but to look up at the sky again. Unfortunate that they are linked since Cloud will just get all the wash of fond amazement and curiosity about the sky.]
You’ve got a real diamond hidden in the rough out here. And you wanted to leave to be one of the big guys.
[ he likes the fond amazement. it's why he doesn't point out that if he hadn't left he'd be dead like everyone else here! it's fine. instead he looks at Jason looking at the stars and feels fond, which is worse. a loop. ]
Yeah, well, not like I was ever gonna cut it as an inn runner. [ it's teasing. ] Can't afford to be rude go one of eight customers out here in the mountains.
[Shut up. He doesn't want to hear that. Cloud would have made it out because he has protagonist armor.
Their fond and endeared feedback loop... This is the gayest thing.] You might've. [It's half-hearted, like he's playing into the joke.] I don't know, so many people with us seem to like you being rude to them.
[The 2(0). He's just saying. He glances at Cloud, then looks away.]
[For a moment, he smirks faintly about the ribbing, but it dissipates afterward. He doesn't look back at Cloud, but his head isn't turned very far away. Cloud can see his eyes shift around the town, then up at the sky.
There is a roll of hesitation in him. It's not from distrust. Cloud can tell that Jason trusts him. It feels more like... uncertainty.]
You know... the people who keep getting put into graves.
[There isn't any point in beating around the bush really. Slowly, he glances sidelong at Cloud.]
[ there's an echoed uncertainty as cloud takes that in, looking at jason in confusion. but he's been an npc! and he's been an npc in a game with roles. so after mulling that over there's a kind of sense of understanding and curiosity ]
... Like a-- job thing? What's the point?
[ why? and actually. wait, more importantly; ]
You buried yourself?
[ never mind he's annoyed he's going to shove jason off this water tower ]
He makes a bit of a face when he's basically scolded in exasperation.] Look. [But it's said in that "THERE'S A REASON!" way.]
I buried myself so no one would start getting suspicious of me. Because I kept ending up in the same places with the people I decided to bury, and I'm quickly becoming one of the last few dudes who're strong enough to do it. I didn't want to waste a chance, but... I had to cover my bases. I didn't know that week would... be that way.
[Yes, he buried his own damn self the worst week imaginable.]
...I don't know the reason. [Frustration bleeds over into Cloud. There's a match start of anger behind it.] Not really. I don't know what happens if I put someone in there who's killing or who ends up dead. It doesn't stop it from happening, but... I don't know if it does anything else because I keep missing.
... Were people actually speculating on who was doing it enough to get to you?
[ he sounds dubious because he doesn't think it truly came up with others. but despite the judgment he's frowning because of the synced frustration, bleeding his own confusion into it. ]
So you've just... been told you've got to bury people every week? [ henwo. ] You went down on how many you did, too. How come?
[Mostly a thrown out "must be a big guy to be doing the ol' burial routine," but it's fine. He waves a hand dismissively about that.]
I don't pick the others. I just get to pick one. Sometimes the others aren't needed. It's... maintenance. That's what the contract calls it. [His brows furrow.] You can't tell anyone either. You can't tell anyone else, or I'm breaking an amendment to my contract, and I'll be toast.
[He sighs.]
I almost buried Dimitri last week, but I changed my mind. Then I picked the wrong Station. [The frustration is there, churning and bubbling. Disappointment.] I should have gone with my first choice.
[ he's calm. sharing this information never even crossed his mind even without that. he can feel jason's frustration and probably could even without being in sync, so after a moment of hesitation he puts a hand on his knee ]
You're picking one person out of twenty something. Odds aren't exactly in your favor. [ he'll give him that much, though he'd feel the same way in his position. and then there confusion is back; ] The wrong "station"?
[Even he's a bit surprised by how easy it is to chill when he has Cloud's hand to focus on instead of the frustration gnawing him to death from the inside.]
Yeah, like... Molly. Lup, Yuri, Harrow, Sheila. The people from the station. I was trying to get someone who I thought the shadows would enjoy toying with for the rest of us. Maximum entertainment. I picked Harrow, but--clearly it was Molly.
...Might have been a close guess, but that doesn't mean you're not still guessing. Shadows don't exactly have logic. [ he squeezes Jason's leg a bit ] Can't blame yourself for that.
It still feels like... nngg, I don't know. I should be more productive.
[This is the Bruce talking.
He makes a face to rival the frustration in him, then drops himself back onto the planks of the platform around the basin. He puts a hand over his eyes.]
I don't even know if it matters. Doing it might not even accomplish jack shit.
Maybe... it'd just move the victim's body somehow if you picked that instead.
[ oh. bye hand... he's looking down himself, thinking of how it could both help and be a detriment, so. ]
So maybe you haven't picked a murderer, but at least you haven't picked the opposite either. [ so it's... neutral? he knows this won't help, he can feel the frustration right there. ]
[No, get the body easier, but if Cloud thinks he's going to see the silver lining when he's the way he is. The petulance deflates a bit, but only because he's with Cloud.]
I'm trying to pick one or the other here to see what would happen.
[ i mean, no, he actually does mean it'd help the killer so it'd be bad to get one, but he gets the urge. to want to just fucking know. he leans back a bit to look more at the sky ]
But you've had shit luck picking, because there's no real way to guess who'll be possessed and who they'll kill. [ it's a nice summary of it. he gets the frustration, really. though, while they're talking about this... ] Probably the third killer was Hua Cheng, this weekend.
[CLOUD, really not helping his esteem here. Sorry to Cloud for the flare of burning hot thoughts of frustration that just come pouring out like a broken dam.]
Lup's group and Hua's group are the biggest out of us right now, so you'd think I'd have a decent rate of success picking from their lot, but as you can see, no I don't. And then I think: maybe that's what the shadows want you to believe, and it's someone else. Like--I don't know. Sebastian. Bradley.
[ there's a stray thought that sounds a lot like "oh, no" when cloud realizes, this is not distracting, ]
Jay. [ the frustration is starting to bleed into him, and it's very hard to differentiate from his own feelings. it's terrible, because that's frustrating too, and he doesn't exactly want a loop of that, but his is tinged with worry. ] There's no rationalizing it out for shadows. You had just as high a chance of getting the right one as the wrong one. It's bad luck.
[He cools under the name call, the turbulent thoughts in him simmering.
He lets out most of it with an exhale, even if he still wears the same frustrated expression. Slowly, he pushes himself up again with his palms, sitting beside Cloud at the edge.]
Sorry. [It’s offered quietly.] I just… feel like I’m putting people through rough shit without it counting for anything.
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[ anyway :) cloud is just going to start climbing. enjoy his ass which is absolutely not why he did that ]
... I know he used to be normal. We were friends, too. [ he doesn't expand on what sephiroth found, because he's still not sure he gets it entirely, and also because he is tired of sephiroth being in this pc. and it's partially why they went up here; once cloud gets up he checks to make sure jason made it up alright and then he points at the sky.
it's very pretty. ]
Here. That's what I wanted you to see the most.
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At the top, he shifts and turns around to put his back to the basin, lifts his head. It’s better than the planetarium because it’s… real. As real as a fake painting in a shitty hotel can be. It’s nothing like the sky in the city.
He stands here, mesmerized by the peppering of stars and the outline of the milky way. It’s so detailed.]
I didn’t even know you could see things like this with your own eyes.
[He did, but the sentiment is it’s amazing.]
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[ it's lightly teasing from where he went to sit down near jason, legs dangling as he looks up himself, glancing at jason out of the corner of his eye to look at his reaction. he sounds and feels fond both. it's terrible and gross. ]
Midgar's as polluted as it gets, but... even in other places in the country where I'd end up going as SOLDIER. Nothing felt quite like seeing the sky from here.
[ there's a shooting star! make a wish jason. mine is to know what the fuck he wanted to tell cloud, but cloud isn't asking yet ]
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He was too into the sky, fuck.
Lowering himself down beside Cloud, he spills his legs over the edge. Can’t help but to look up at the sky again. Unfortunate that they are linked since Cloud will just get all the wash of fond amazement and curiosity about the sky.]
You’ve got a real diamond hidden in the rough out here. And you wanted to leave to be one of the big guys.
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Yeah, well, not like I was ever gonna cut it as an inn runner. [ it's teasing. ] Can't afford to be rude go one of eight customers out here in the mountains.
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Their fond and endeared feedback loop... This is the gayest thing.] You might've. [It's half-hearted, like he's playing into the joke.] I don't know, so many people with us seem to like you being rude to them.
[The 2(0). He's just saying. He glances at Cloud, then looks away.]
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[ he says it like jason is not rude to him. it's fine. he looks at jason after jason has glanced away ]
So what did you want to tell me, anyway?
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There is a roll of hesitation in him. It's not from distrust. Cloud can tell that Jason trusts him. It feels more like... uncertainty.]
You know... the people who keep getting put into graves.
[There isn't any point in beating around the bush really. Slowly, he glances sidelong at Cloud.]
It's me.
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... Like a-- job thing? What's the point?
[ why? and actually. wait, more importantly; ]
You buried yourself?
[ never mind he's annoyed he's going to shove jason off this water tower ]
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He makes a bit of a face when he's basically scolded in exasperation.] Look. [But it's said in that "THERE'S A REASON!" way.]
I buried myself so no one would start getting suspicious of me. Because I kept ending up in the same places with the people I decided to bury, and I'm quickly becoming one of the last few dudes who're strong enough to do it. I didn't want to waste a chance, but... I had to cover my bases. I didn't know that week would... be that way.
[Yes, he buried his own damn self the worst week imaginable.]
...I don't know the reason. [Frustration bleeds over into Cloud. There's a match start of anger behind it.] Not really. I don't know what happens if I put someone in there who's killing or who ends up dead. It doesn't stop it from happening, but... I don't know if it does anything else because I keep missing.
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[ he sounds dubious because he doesn't think it truly came up with others. but despite the judgment he's frowning because of the synced frustration, bleeding his own confusion into it. ]
So you've just... been told you've got to bury people every week? [ henwo. ] You went down on how many you did, too. How come?
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[Mostly a thrown out "must be a big guy to be doing the ol' burial routine," but it's fine. He waves a hand dismissively about that.]
I don't pick the others. I just get to pick one. Sometimes the others aren't needed. It's... maintenance. That's what the contract calls it. [His brows furrow.] You can't tell anyone either. You can't tell anyone else, or I'm breaking an amendment to my contract, and I'll be toast.
[He sighs.]
I almost buried Dimitri last week, but I changed my mind. Then I picked the wrong Station. [The frustration is there, churning and bubbling. Disappointment.] I should have gone with my first choice.
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[ he's calm. sharing this information never even crossed his mind even without that. he can feel jason's frustration and probably could even without being in sync, so after a moment of hesitation he puts a hand on his knee ]
You're picking one person out of twenty something. Odds aren't exactly in your favor. [ he'll give him that much, though he'd feel the same way in his position. and then there confusion is back; ] The wrong "station"?
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Yeah, like... Molly. Lup, Yuri, Harrow, Sheila. The people from the station. I was trying to get someone who I thought the shadows would enjoy toying with for the rest of us. Maximum entertainment. I picked Harrow, but--clearly it was Molly.
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[This is the Bruce talking.
He makes a face to rival the frustration in him, then drops himself back onto the planks of the platform around the basin. He puts a hand over his eyes.]
I don't even know if it matters. Doing it might not even accomplish jack shit.
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[ he'll call out the bias. but jasson drops and cloud looks at him in concern ]
They never explain what the maintenance is for?
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Not really. In vague words. I asked if it was supposed to help in theory and was told "in theory." That it could be a detriment.
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[ oh. bye hand... he's looking down himself, thinking of how it could both help and be a detriment, so. ]
So maybe you haven't picked a murderer, but at least you haven't picked the opposite either. [ so it's... neutral? he knows this won't help, he can feel the frustration right there. ]
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[No, get the body easier, but if Cloud thinks he's going to see the silver lining when he's the way he is. The petulance deflates a bit, but only because he's with Cloud.]
I'm trying to pick one or the other here to see what would happen.
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But you've had shit luck picking, because there's no real way to guess who'll be possessed and who they'll kill. [ it's a nice summary of it. he gets the frustration, really. though, while they're talking about this... ] Probably the third killer was Hua Cheng, this weekend.
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Great. I missed him by a week.
[CLOUD, really not helping his esteem here. Sorry to Cloud for the flare of burning hot thoughts of frustration that just come pouring out like a broken dam.]
Lup's group and Hua's group are the biggest out of us right now, so you'd think I'd have a decent rate of success picking from their lot, but as you can see, no I don't. And then I think: maybe that's what the shadows want you to believe, and it's someone else. Like--I don't know. Sebastian. Bradley.
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Jay. [ the frustration is starting to bleed into him, and it's very hard to differentiate from his own feelings. it's terrible, because that's frustrating too, and he doesn't exactly want a loop of that, but his is tinged with worry. ] There's no rationalizing it out for shadows. You had just as high a chance of getting the right one as the wrong one. It's bad luck.
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He lets out most of it with an exhale, even if he still wears the same frustrated expression. Slowly, he pushes himself up again with his palms, sitting beside Cloud at the edge.]
Sorry. [It’s offered quietly.] I just… feel like I’m putting people through rough shit without it counting for anything.
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... You're not succeeding, but you're trying. I think it still counts. It's not like you're doing this for kicks.
[ obviously. he leans his elbows on his knees, looking down at the town ]
And people are getting good at getting people out now. It's not as bad.
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